A farmer and his young daughter helps a talking cow reach the corporate security of a fried chicken franchise while being hunted by assassins hired by the cattleman’s association.

tradingdavid Penpusher Asked on December 31, 2015 in Comedy.
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2 Review(s)

You almost have it except, why does the cow need to go to the fried chicken franchise, and trust me – THIS IS IMPORTANT KNOWLEDGE…

Lucius Paisley Logliner Reviewed on December 31, 2015.
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Agreed with the above.

The main character could either be the farmer or cow, as a result the plot is unclear. If the MC is the farmer then his goal is to help the cow, but if the MC is the cow then its goal is to reach the fried chicken franchise.

Aside from the lack of clarity about the MC, the assassins feel like an unnecessary addition put in to increase the stakes. While this is needed, seeing as the stakes are low without it, there is no clear logical connection because the stakes and goal due to lack of a cause end effect relationship.

Lastly why do any of the characters NEED to do what ever it is they are doing now? The logline lacks an inciting incident in other words, it lacks the event that pushed the main character to go on a journey.

Nir Shelter Singularity Reviewed on January 3, 2016.
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