A fraud investigator must go to Europe and through Siberian catacombs to find out the truth about her father who mastermind an international criminal heist

Corridor One

corridorone Penpusher Asked on September 8, 2015 in Public.
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3 Review(s)

TheĀ  inciting incident seems to be missing here.

Nina Logliner Reviewed on September 30, 2015.
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Hi! First time reviewing loglines here:

I think you could trim down the: “And trough Siberian catacombs”, and instead tell us what happens if she doesn’t find her father, or WHY does she need to find the truth about him.

Andrew_east Default Reviewed on September 8, 2015.
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Andrew has a good point. What does she hope to achieve by find out the truth? How is she going to use this knowledge? It would make it a more compelling Logline. This is a far more compact and better Logline than your previous versions. You have dropped so much of the unneeded detail. Well done.

Tighten the line and add the goal and you have a great result.

CraigDGriffiths Mentor Reviewed on September 8, 2015.
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