A man comes into the possession of a time traveling device which he uses to help himself rob a bank.

Tidd Penpusher Asked on November 16, 2015 in SciFi.

Already seen this movie sorry….

on May 21, 2016.
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3 Review(s)

The  logline sets up a situation for a potential plot, but it doesn’t fulfill a logline’s primary purpose which is to succinctly sketch a plot.  So the time traveling machine is supposed to make it easy — a sure thing —  for him to rob a bank, right?  Then what’s the protagonist’s dramatic problem? Who or what threatens to defeat his get-rich-quick-and-easy scheme?

And what’s at stake?  Which is to ask:  why does he want to rob a bank and why should the audience root for him to succeed? (Or should they?)

dpg Singularity Reviewed on November 17, 2015.

Your comment was a great help. Thank you.very much.
I envision it as a short film in which I plan to show how a clever thief(I should have mentioned thief) uses
the device to rob a bank. His clever plan is what the short film is supposed to be all about.

I understood the problem with my log line through your comment. It was my first so hopefully I’ll do better next time. Thank you again.

on November 17, 2015.
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Good notes above.

Also think of an aspect of his character that would make him a lovable type of thief, like Woody Allen’s character in Small Time Crooks. Even though he is the main character he still needs to be made available as an empathetic one for the audience, and especially in this instance considering his chosen profession.

Nir Shelter Singularity Reviewed on November 17, 2015.

Got it.
Thank you.

on November 17, 2015.
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I an not sure of the logic.

If I had a time machine, I would definitely use the device to make money, however the last thing I would do is rob a bank. I would use it to bet on Superbowls, I would use it to win the lotto. I would invest money in Microsoft when it first started… I would buy US bonds, then cash them in, in the future.

With all the sure fire ways to make money from a time machine, why rob a bank? (If there is a personal reason, it should be in the logline)

Richiev Singularity Reviewed on November 20, 2015.
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