A man who thought he could change the traditional values and cultural status quo of his local community and who in the process, unwittingly challenged the powers that be. Powers embedded in the system to protect against and ensure such atrocity would not take flight; thus dangerously endangering his life and that of the members of his family. From the rural lands to the bright lights of an unknown and strange city, the battle raged.

Oracle Penpusher Asked on December 31, 2015 in Drama.

So much is going on in this logline, but so little is explained.

on December 31, 2015.
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3 Review(s)

…. To complicated for me. Don’t get the main theme.

Rutger Oosterhoff Samurai Reviewed on December 31, 2015.
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As previously mentioned this logline is confusing and fails to describe a plot.

Best not to describe in detail the thoughts of the characters nor the status quo in the society they live in, rather let the tensions and stakes become clear as a result of the story elements.

The next draft of the logline should focus on the main character, his goal and nothing else.

Nir Shelter Singularity Reviewed on December 31, 2015.
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As noted, the logline is too long and too general.  Almost every drama is essentially a story about someone who takes on the  status quo,  who challenges the powers-that-be, who  puts his life in jeopardy.   This logline needs particulars, specifics.

dpg Singularity Reviewed on January 1, 2016.
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