A well-liked young man is found dead in the city’s reservoir. The police rule it an accident but the victim’s best friend – a recently paroled thief – learns the deceased had his greedy fingers in many dangerous pies. With help from friends and family, his investigation draws the attention of local thugs, corrupt cops, and the head of a multi-national, and he soon realizes there is no one he can trust.

Alex Cassun Penpusher Asked on November 25, 2015 in Noir.
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2 Review(s)

Suspecting a friend’s death wasn’t an accident a parolee….

You also need to add what he wants to happen.

….. wants those responsible bought to justice.  Starting a battle to the death with thugs, corrupt cops and multinationals.

We need to know “who”, “what they want”, “what happens or what is stopping them” and even “how they over come it”.

CraigDGriffiths Overlord Reviewed on November 25, 2015.
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What does the protagonist want to do — need to do — in light of what he knows and what are the personal stakes for the protagonist in solving the mystery?

Consider Chinatown: Hollis Mulray is found dead in an L.A. reservoir, the police initially rule his death an accident.  But that isn’t good enough for private detective J.J. Gittes.  Why?  Because by then he realizes he’s been played for a fool being hired to snoop on Mulray by someone claiming to be his wife. “LA is a small town…people talk, I don’t want to become a local joke.”.  What is at stake for him in solving the crime is his personal and professional reputation.  He MUST know who set him up — and why.

dpg Singularity Reviewed on November 26, 2015.
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