After he is ‘killed’ by a female undercover cop, an innocent man is ‘saved’ by a female bounty hunter who hallucinates slices of the future and must collect thr bounty on his future badass self.

.

kbfilmworks Samurai Asked on September 29, 2015 in Action.
Add Comment
2 Review(s)

Hello,

to me it sounds too confusing,

maybe you can avoid some details to tell the sory in a more linear way?

FFF Mentor Reviewed on September 29, 2015.
Add Comment

Whilst this is almost a carbon copy of your previous logline.

Simplify this down. Get rid of the killed and saved in quotation marks, it confuses the reader.

This might have elements similar to Memento i.e. the time slice flashes similar to memory flashes/post-it notes: “A man, suffering from short-term memory loss, uses notes and tattoos to hunt for the man he thinks killed his wife.”

Find other films, TV shows that are similar and find their loglines and use those loglines as a guide to write yours.

It should clearly mention the protagonist, the antagonist, the goal, the stakes and do so in a way that hooks us and want to read.

priggy Logliner Reviewed on September 29, 2015.
Add Comment

Your Review

By posting your review, you agree to the privacy policy and terms of service.