Awaiting the arrival of a fugitive, a ruthless bounty hunter holds hostage the patrons of a sleazy bar but soon discovers the imminent arrival of another fugitive: a killer with advanced mental powers from an alternate reality.


    kbfilmworks Samurai Asked on January 5, 2015 in Public.
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    8 Review(s)

    Start at “A ruthless..” you already make the point when you say ‘Another’. I am also unsure about that. Do you mean a second person or a different person ‘another’ can be taken both ways. It has everything it needs, nice logline.

    Default Reviewed on January 5, 2015.
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      It sounds like the bounty hunter is your protagonist, or is it the patrons of the bar?

      If it’s the bounty hunter, from I gather in this logline he’s no better than the killers/fugitives he’s after. You can have an unlikeable MC, but the audience should be able to, if not sympathize with him, at least empathize with him. Does he have any redeeming qualities? Maybe you can replace “ruthless” with whatever that quality might be.


      Default Reviewed on January 6, 2015.
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        Hi Gilgamesh, the bounty hunter is the protagonist. I think in this situation the main character is the best of a bad bunch. Relative to the guys he’s after he’s a good guy because he takes down people who harm innocent citizens. I might take your advice and change ‘ruthless’ to ‘relentless’.

        kbfilmworks Samurai Reviewed on January 6, 2015.
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          Why is the bounty hunter holding people hostage? What does that act (not the location) have to with waiting for a fugitive? IOW: why must he hold the others hostage?

          And if the fugitive who shows up has such extraordinary powers, isn’t the fight (hence the plot) over with — game, set match –in the fugitive’s favor as soon as he arrives? What mojo has the bounty hunter got that enables him to have a fighting chance?

          dpg Singularity Reviewed on January 6, 2015.
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