Adapted from the book The Last Stand of Fox Company about a real battle over six nights in subfreezing temperatures during the Korean War: A brainy captain and 250 inexperienced Marines defend a vital evacuation route against an invading horde of Chinese soldiers to save another 8,000 Marines from annihilation.

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Geschwindt Penpusher Asked on September 26, 2015 in War.

Would it be good to say – ‘Based on a true story’?
Its only me but I felt there was a tad too much detail, as in ‘Fox Company’ and ‘scraggly’
Great concept of heroes in the snow against insuperable odds.
But who is the hero?  Or the small band – not 246 – of heroes, that we can identify with?
It sounds like something I’d go and watch so good luck.

on September 26, 2015.

I would say “based on a true story”in a pitch or treatment but I don’t think it holds a place in a logline. I agree that ‘Fox Co’ could come out of the line, tho. Good point about the number of details ‘cuz it could slow down the reading of the line. 

The main character is the CO, the former marksmanship instructor, who’s now in charge of the scraggly group, hence the detail about him. There’s a lot of characters to “root for” but only one is highlighted. I’ll make an adjustment and re-post. Thanks.

on September 26, 2015.
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4 Review(s)
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Great ‘Battle of Thermopylae’ type set up!   Compelling stakes and antagonist forces.  I do have a quibble about the Korean War setting … It seems a bit too far back in the past … However, the harsh snowy environment and the fact that this is not yet another Vietnam War flick are strong positives here.  So not pushing that angle.

Hard to improve the logline, as it really states the stakes well.

Steven Fernandez Penpusher Reviewed on September 26, 2015.

Thanks. It’s actually based on real events and a great book titled The Last Stand of Fox Company, so it can only be this era and place. The battle also holds a special record of having the highest casualty ratio of all time. As a Marine Officer who spent a good amount of time in Korea I’m pretty excited to write this. Thanks for the compliment as well. I’m glad you like the logline.

About the Thermopylae reference, you’re right. In the epilogue the authors comment on this and how the survivors heard the comparison as well. They write, “Mythology is what never was, but always is.”

on September 26, 2015.
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The concept has a lot of potential with high stakes and a clear danger that needs little explanation. I believe that with the exception of M.A.S.H there have been few main stream successful films made about the Korean war so the subject mater could prove to be an interesting addition to the war genre.

The logline construct is a problem as it doesn’t read well due to lack of grammatical refining and well described plot points.  What is the starting point of the story? What propelled the MC into action? What is the inciting incident?
Could it be the death of the commanding officer which was leading the fight to keep the route open that made the marksmanship instructor take command?

What is his flaw ? What is going to be the MC’s journey of change throughout the story?
It is this that will make this a moving story to watch.

His goal s to keep the evacuation rout open this much is clear but the story cold greatly benefit from an antagonist that is motivated in direct opposition to the MC. Could there be a specific Korean commander you could describe as the antagonist the MC is up against?

As this is an adaptation from book to screen you should feel free to dramatize the conflicts, actions and struggles with visual events. Point is you don’t have to stick to the original story page for page because you will likely have to make significant changes to make the story work for cinema.

Hope this helps.

Nir Shelter Singularity Reviewed on September 27, 2015.
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The Title “Chosen” would work for this story

Richiev Singularity Reviewed on September 26, 2015.
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“Over six days of close combat, 246 marines of Fox Company hold off 40,000 Chinese soldiers determined to overrun the Division’s evacuation route”.

Is this a true story?

kbfilmworks Samurai Reviewed on September 26, 2015.

Yes. True. Also an adaptation of the book The Last Stand of Fox Company.

on September 26, 2015.

I’ve also seen other ratios for the larger conflict of 10,000 within the Division to 100,000 Chinese in the region. The actual number 40,000 is an estimate around the size and number of the enemy units amassed around this company.

on September 26, 2015.

I like this version, it is much more concise. Maybe “Over six days of close combat, a marksman instructor leads a team of 246 marines to hold off 40,000…”?

on September 26, 2015.
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