When a harmless prank and a mystifying homicide collide, two men decide to run from the police to figure out who set them up. Their camaraderie shatters when one ends up in jail and the other one suddenly has a flawless alibi. A relentless detective keeps unravelling the truth behind a remarkably twisted story that keeps on washing up new suspects at every turn.
you can improuve you’re logline beeing more specific. “Two men” is absolutely vague… what men? This is an important detail to define the story.
Make clear who is the main character, the running prankers or the detective? You have to choose and write the logline from his point of view.
Make it one sentence.
And, very very important, never say things like “unravelling the truth behind a remarkably twisted story”. This is very unprofessional, believe me 🙂 A logline tells the story. It’s not a recipe for the story (‘there will be compelling characters, unbearable suspence and a shocking unforgettable ending’).
One last thing,
the idea of a prank that collide with a real murder is interesting, but i feel like it’s the first 15 minutes of the movie, then we have a classic “i’m innocent, find the real murderer” movie- there’s nothing wrong with this structure but I would appreciate if the “prank” theme is stressed and take over the whole movie, because this is what is strong in your idea. Something like “when two prankers are framed for murder they must use their prank genius to con the police while looking for the true murderes”.
The greatest asset a writer can have is the ability to accept feedback, be it screenwriting-guru like generic or not.
You never know what pearls of wisdom lie in the, seemingly inappropriate, comments a stranger can make until you employ complete objectivity.
All the best, you’re welcome back anytime.