SDMann's Profile
Penpusher
35
points

Loglines
9

Reviews
7

  • Penpusher Posted on December 21, 2015 in Crime.

    Yeah so I thought that trade-off would be one of the dilemmas faced by┬áto the drug lord. Does he go along with the arrangement and have a better chance of delivering short-term profits and then leave the game or reject it and potentially build a bigger empire over time but take on greater risk by not having the cover of police protection while he’s at it? For the Police Chief, he has crossed into illegal activities so he constantly needs to cover his tracks. This could include a police officer discovering his plot, rival drug gangs moving in on the empire’s turf, having one of the drug gang’s members be arrested and at risk of talking about the arrangement. Similar to that documentary ‘The Seven Five’..

    • 581 views
    • 3 reviews
    • 0 votes
  • Penpusher Posted on March 17, 2015 in Public.

    Thanks, yeah thought it was pure horror, the protagonist and his fellow driver need to escape these cult members that they’ve revealed to the world. The villainous cult members stand in the way of that. The police are left with eerie photos to piece together what happened and where is the protagonist..

    • 530 views
    • 7 reviews
    • 0 votes
  • Penpusher Posted on August 10, 2013 in Public.

    Hey guys, thanks a lot for the feedback. Yeah I realised the ‘secretly’ element is confusing as written, it refers to the protagonist disguising his identity and crowd-sourcing the votes submitted by the viewers of his Wikileak’d videos online. His proclamation of doing this deed is made with the belief that his identity will not be revealed until his death. It was inspired by stories in the US of the Death By Cop phenomenon, where some people have gone on shooting sprees in order to be killed by police because, within their interpretation of scripture, murder is a forgivable sin and taking one’s own life is not. In regards playing God for a fool, I felt the same way but am not sure whether it’s enough for the protagonist to strongly believe in his own actions even if the audience will have their own views on the protagonist’s value system and not agree with them? I tried to balance out the inherent ‘unlikeability’ of a character choosing this method of suicide by having him try to do, in his mind, a good rather than a bad deed in order to fulfill his own demise. His disguised online rants are filled with comments about his distaste for the state of society, speaking about the unconscionable actions of Wall Street bankers and paedophiles getting placed back into society with their identities hidden, etc. In this sense his vigilante actions are part Travis Bickle and the many views he gets for his rants touch a nerve akin to Network. His catalyst to act is the authorities closing in on him for his past misdeeds and he fears a life trapped in prison suffering the depression that currently afflicts him. I thought it would be an interesting switch to have death, specifically the right kind of death, be the goal and the stakes being the risk of capture and imprisonment. I thought that it then might be interesting if he employs a hitman partner to help coordinate the killing without revealing that he is the ‘Crowd-Sourced Killer’, as the media dub him. His flawed choice of involving others in his plan then puts them in harms way and he has to do the honourable thing of saving them from the authorities and the response of the targeted parties as his plan spirals out of control. Will have another go at the logline now, thanks again.

    • 506 views
    • 7 reviews
    • 0 votes
  • Penpusher Posted on August 9, 2013 in Public.

    Thanks for the feedback, really appreciate it – Yeah I was thinking that it would be different to Hall Pass in that it would not be sanctioned by her partner and that much of the drama would come from her dilemma of whether to reveal it to her husband or not. The stakes are her marriage ending but she can technically pursue the crush and tell her partner without damaging their relationship or try to keep it hidden and risk greater repercussions if it is revealed to him later on, given that she then would have deceived him. I was thinking that if you used a real celebrity there would be humor in there carefully-groomed public appearance being far different from that of their real persona which could be very slovenly, erratic or unstable to the point of putting her in danger. So maybe something like, ‘After sleeping with her Celebrity Free Pass without her husband’s knowledge, a woman’s life is turned upside down when the celebrity is not at all like his public persona and will not give her up’. This then creates the free pass as the antagonist if he is in opposition of her goal of maintaining her marriage. I was also deliberating on whether to have the protagonist be a a man or woman and trying to figure out whether the potential scope of a story like this would work best as a feature length film or more as a plot-line to a half-hour sitcom. Thanks again for the feedback.

    • 600 views
    • 7 reviews
    • 0 votes