RE: A down-on-his-luck videographer breaks his estranged mother out of prison to steal the grand prize from a filthy rich YouTuber – a million-dollar Bitcoin.
There’s definitely something here but I think the motivation for the bitcoin needs to be apparent to the reader. Currently, I feel like the only reason he’s going after it is because he’s down on his luck. I also think you need to clarify why he MUST break his mum out of prison – she has to be a master criminal/hacker. It’s a comedy so some absurdity in the situation will be expected but we have to believe they are remotely capable of this.
The issue I have with a bitcoin being the prize… it’s a digital currency. So are we simply going to watch a guy and his master hacker mum sitting at a computer for 90mins? How do you even steal a bitcoin?
Why videographer? How does this play in? Doesn’t necessarily have to be apparent in the logline, but I think a logline works better when there’s a continuous and obvious connection between the words chosen.
Why is nobody else trying to steal this bitcoin?
If they’re bungling idiots, how have they got a chance of succeeding? We watch Home Alone and we know from the start, the 8 year old is gonna win. If these guys are the protagonists, we have to want them succeed – so we have to believe they can.
Very interested to see where this goes though.
Hope this helps.