RE: After falling in love with twin sisters, an irresolute Iranian student has to decide with whom he wants to spend his life with before getting forcibly married to an unkown woman by his family.
Making a decision is not an objective visual goal. It happens in the character’s head. How is this represented on screen?
“After falling in love with twin sisters” – an inciting incident should be one moment, one scene – a shark eats a tourist/he discovers a lost alien in his bike shed etc. After he fell in love with the first, he suddenly falls in love with the second too? I worry that he’s coming across as someone who doesn’t really know what he wants and it’s difficult to get behind a protagonist who doesn’t have a clear objective.
I think the whole arranged marriage element is interesting. However, I’m conscious that it’s been done before – Brick Lane, The Big Sick, Arthur – so what’s different here? I agree wholeheartedly with yqwertz with this feeling like a male-fantasy, with two dimensional female characters.
Conflict wise, I agree there is some conflict to be found AFTER he’s made his decision. But, before this point, all the conflict is inside his head. What’s happening on screen?
Hope this helps.