A college student fights false accusations of rape against corrupted councelor and his rapist son to clear his reputation as stakes go higher with upcoming town elections.

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    Samurai Posted on November 3, 2017 in Thriller.
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    5 Review(s)

      This is too confusing to read and understand. I think dividing a logline like this one into two parts helps a lot.

      With upcoming town elections just around the corner, a college student fights against false accusations of rape spread by a corrupted councelor and his rapist son.

      I like the idea of a young person fighting against corruption at a higher level.  We also have a ticking time clock as an urgency with the upcoming elections and the objective goal is also clear.
      One little thing: Does the student want to run for office as well? That’s not clearly stated in your concept here.

      Samurai Answered on November 3, 2017.
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        What about the victim?  Why doesn’t she clear his name?  If the son was the one who raped the woman, and the student save her, why isn’t she defending the student’s innocence?  There can only be a legal case if she’s pressing charges against the student.

        Singularity Answered on November 4, 2017.
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          I am working with two versions with the story of the victim. Either she has been knocked down during the rape and now she has a concussion, manipulated by corrupted doctor / psychiatrist later on to make her believe the protagonist did the rape, or she directly (or her parents who are pressing her down) has been threatened and bribed by the council man to change their version. In first case, main protagonist goal would be to find a way to change victims testimony (abduct her and try to refresh her memory by dragging her to the place of rape to make her remember), in the other it would be to find hard evidence (biological traces DNA or some leverage on parents to do the right thing, which enforces further investigation why the council man needs to win the election and how it would do damage to the town’s interest and its people).

          Samurai Answered on November 4, 2017.
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            Your story seems to depend on a lot of coincidental circumstances and corrupt people conspiring against the young man.

            A lot.

            What’s the dramatic point you are trying to make having an entire community willfully aligned against the student?

            Singularity Answered on November 4, 2017.

            My hero is a school protector of weak and presents a puriness and is loved by students and most adults in the town. Problem is that he is well aware of that and puts in too much on display. So the bad guys loves the opportunity to burst his bubble and show that he is same dirt as they are

            on November 4, 2017.
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              Thanx mate. No, the student only wants to clear his name, however, his enemies are tough because the true rapist is a misbehaving son of an influential politician, who has police and doctor in a pocket (and also paid some cash to the parents of the raped girl) and if this affair comes into a spotlight, the councelor might loose the elections, which might cost his life because a criminal mob is paying his elections to run some nasty town business. Thats the idea. Its basicaly whole town against this student trying to prove his innocence. There is also a little irony hidden in there which I am not sure how to implement there as the student actually stopped the rape and saved the girl. Just things turned against him afterwards.

              Samurai Answered on November 4, 2017.

              I think it would be much more interesting if the student would run for office and had to settle the accusations of rape in order to clear his name and reputation.
              But just my thoughts, man!

              on November 5, 2017.
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