A loner ice road trucker finds herself the unlikely protector of a young gangland execution witness, and must race them across the wild Alaskan ice roads to the border while being hunted by the merciless criminals.

    COLD RUSH

    Penpusher Posted on August 14, 2015 in Public.
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    3 Review(s)

      I’m not sure if my issue with the longline is the wording, or just the storyline. Not sure why the trucker would be the protector of a witness, and why they need to race to the border.

      Default Answered on August 15, 2015.
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        Logically if the gang they are fleeing are criminals they wouldn’t care in which country the target is they would just kill them anyway.

        Defining the MC’s as someone who finds her self dilutes her morals and dilemma. She should need to make the hardest decision of her life and choose to protect someone else despite clear and immanent danger for the audience to be riveted by her actions, admire her aptitude and root for her success.

        Best to describe a good inciting incident that puts her in the position of decision whether or not to risk her own life for someone else.

        Lastly the logline lacks a clear a and definitive end to the plot or in other words a goal. What specifically is the MC fighting for are they trying to get to a safe heaven? If so where and what will it look? Is it a police station or an FBI HQ define specifically what the MC is trying soo hard to achieve.

        Hope this helps.

        Singularity Answered on August 16, 2015.
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          And what good will getting to the border do? “Merciless criminals” are not going to be deterred by a border.

          Singularity Answered on August 17, 2015.
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