A shy adolescent is forced to question her identity when she and a mysterious new friend are chased across the states by a vengeful Police Officer.

    Penpusher Posted on July 31, 2019 in Coming of Age.
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      If a “vengeful police officer” is chasing her “mysterious new friend” shouldn’t she question her friend’s identity, not her own?

      Once a police officer crosses an administrative district (county line, state line) he is out of jurisdiction and can no longer make an arrest unless he is in hot pursuit. If the officer has a reason for pursuing the pair, then put it in the logline. If the officer is not in hot pursuit, then the pair can go to the next police station and have the officer arrested – problem solved.

      Mentor Answered on July 31, 2019.
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        Yqwertz is correct on the technical point of the officer’s jurisdictional boundary.

        Also, why is the adolescents ID in question as a result of being chased by law enforcement?  I can guess what the problem with her ID is, but a logline shouldn’t leave me guessing on an important element in the plot.

        “Also forced to question”  is not an specific objective goal.  It’s a plot problem.  What is her objective goal?  What must  she because she’s being pursued over something about her identity?  Check out the guidelines under “Our Formula” for how to build an industry standard logline.

        Singularity Answered on July 31, 2019.
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          What is the vengeful police officer, seeking vengeance for? Does the lead character know why the police officer wants vengeance?

          Singularity Answered on July 31, 2019.
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