A wannabe activist who aspires to join a larger action group gets a job at a mysterious energy company he believes is involved in illegal activities.

    Penpusher Posted on July 21, 2019 in Adventure.
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      What does he want to be active about?  I’m guessing it has something to do with environmental  issues.  But a logline should not leave a reader guessing what the role of the main character is.  So be specific:  “An environmental activist….”

      What becomes his objective goal as a result of joining the energy company?   What specifically does he want to uncover,  to expose? “Illegal activities” is too general, can cover a wide range of malfeasance.   In “Erin Brockovich” the protagonist must prove that a plague of illnesses in a community is the result of the energy utility dumping toxic waste into the groundwater.

      Singularity Answered on July 21, 2019.

      yes,  you are right,  appreciate the feedback

      on July 22, 2019.
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        Sounds like a promising idea!

        Just make sure to be more specific in your wording. He needs to have a clear outer goal (want) that is properly described in your logline.

        And yes, “environmental activist” sounds better than just “activist”, because it gives the reader a clear vision of the main character and his background.

        Samurai Answered on July 23, 2019.
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