JanCabalLogliner Posted: December 14, 20132013-12-14T16:59:11+10:00 2013-12-14T16:59:11+10:00In: PublicAble to wink only, paralyzed, but slowly recovering man agrees to sexual plays with a jealous nurse, but now he has to fight his helplessness, as he must stop her before she kills him and his family.Helplessness ShareFacebook3 ReviewsVotedOldestRecentdpg 105 Loglines 5,540 Reviews 558 Best Reviews 111,896 Points View Profile dpg Singularity 2013-12-16T07:09:37+10:00Added an answer on December 16, 2013 at 7:09 am I think the premise has possibilities. But the logline raises as many questions in my mind as it answers. Such as:Why would the nurse be jealous of a paralyzed man?How could he communicate to her about sex — let alone engage in it — when he’s 99.9% paralyzed?And while the hanky-panky may be a part of they story, I’m not sure it’s necessary to include in the logline. A logline should focus on the principal action which is murder, not sex.0 Share ShareShare on FacebookShare on TwitterShare on LinkedInShare on WhatsAppLincWilder 1 Loglines 6 Reviews 0 Best Reviews 0 Points View Profile LincWilder 2013-12-17T10:32:31+10:00Added an answer on December 17, 2013 at 10:32 am There’s information in the logline that distracts from the premise, which, if I’ve read it correctly, is this:A temporarily paralyzed man on the mend must fight his sense of helplessness to stop his mentally unstable nurse from killing him and his family.0 Share ShareShare on FacebookShare on TwitterShare on LinkedInShare on WhatsAppJanCabal 17 Loglines 51 Reviews 2 Best Reviews 538 Points View Profile JanCabal Logliner 2013-12-17T14:56:04+10:00Added an answer on December 17, 2013 at 2:56 pm Thank you guys. I got your points. LincWilder you nailed it. I think that I can actually use that0 Share ShareShare on FacebookShare on TwitterShare on LinkedInShare on WhatsAppYou must login to can add an answer. Username or email* Password* Remember Me! Forgot Password?