After an explosion opens a hole for demons to escape from Hell, the dweller of humanity, aka the devil’s son, goes to earth to run up the demons before Yahweh sends his armies to clean up the mess, sending every demons into oblivion along with the dweller, if he’s still there.

Samurai Posted on May 1, 2019 in Fantasy.
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3 Review(s)

This logline is getting better.

I would drop the term ‘dweller of humanity‘ since it just adds words to the logline and doesn’t really tell us anything.

Also, I think this story would work well with a ticking clock. The devil’s son is given a specific amount of time to clean up the mess… or else.

Singularity Answered on May 1, 2019.
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Demons take  the Devils son through a portal that opens up in hell. Yahweh is called upon but for Yahweh to exist so does the devils son.

Penpusher Answered on May 1, 2019.
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There are some questions that spawn from reading this logline. What explosion is this? Who caused it? Was it accidental? If so then you don’t need to say that an explosion opened the portal, you can just say that the portal was opened. Also as Richiev said, it works so much better with a ticking clock. That way we feel the urgency and stakes.

Samurai Answered on May 4, 2019.
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