After getting injected with a rage serum, the injected man must use his new found abilities to stop a rich vengeful businessman from flooding the streets with his serum to destroy the city.

Samurai Posted on March 31, 2019 in Superhero.
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6 Review(s)

I’m kinda riding this one close to the vest. It’s still in writing mode, but this is round one of a previous one. The motivational speaker stopping the businessman from previous logline. I took a new turn on it to create this one.

Samurai Answered on March 31, 2019.
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This still doesn’t address the main problem. Businessmen need law and order to sell their product. A destroyed city won’t be good for business.
Why would a businessman want to destroy a city?

Singularity Answered on March 31, 2019.
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How is it that after ‘getting injected’ he MUST ‘save the city’? How’s the Inciting Incident propelling him towards the Goal?

Summitry Answered on March 31, 2019.
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>> I’m kinda riding this one close to the vest. It’s still in writing mode,

The point of a logline for craft is to tell the story in brief and to test its appeal before spending months on the script (with beat sheets or outlines and whatnot in between).

The protag needs more of a description than “man.” The rage part would be the same with anybody so what makes him ironic or special in this predicament? What is it about this one rage guy that makes us think he has a little hope in stopping the villain?  Why is he needed at all, why can’t the police deal with such a bad guy?

After getting injected, is he enraged the entire time? If yes, would that get tiring? Is part of his conflict trying to act clearly while enraged, the inner battle of human vs animal?

Mentor Answered on April 1, 2019.
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Both characters seem pretty angry… a bit same same.  I guess it’s good for a hero to mirror the villain, but I don’t really understand the hero’s motivation.

Samurai Answered on April 2, 2019.
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I generally agree with the other reviews, but I see a great ironic twist.  One would think the injected raging protag must use his raging abilities to compassionately save the city. I’d see the movie based on just this.

Penpusher Answered on April 6, 2019.
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