After receiving a personality implant to find a nuclear weapon, the officer starts noticing malfunctions of a previous personality that makes it harder for him to complete his mission.

    Samurai Posted on May 12, 2019 in Crime.
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    3 Review(s)

      This is very confusing.

      What is a personality implant? How will a different personality help him find a nuke? Why does he need to find the bomb? Was it stolen? Does an enemy of the state have it?

      All this good stuff, needs to either come through or be insinuated by the logline.



      Singularity Answered on May 12, 2019.
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        Maybe something like –
        “A military officer volunteers for an implant giving him the know-how to track down a nuclear weapon. But this isn’t his first implant, and he soon struggles with multiple conflicting personalities.”

        Samurai Answered on May 12, 2019.

        This makes sense and could work, yet the work “But” is what’s killing it. I need a better way to put it together and leave that out.

        Thank you though. A good attempt.

        on May 12, 2019.
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          There needs to be a little connection between implant and finding the weapon. This will then give you scope for why the previous personality is an issue.

          Singularity Answered on May 12, 2019.
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