henbSamurai Posted: June 30, 20192019-06-30T08:02:19+10:00 2019-06-30T08:02:19+10:00In: SciFiBillions of refugees seek shelter from deadly weather events, antibiotics have lost their potency, nations wage wars over land and water, and activists not opposed to violence towards humans try to save animals from extinction.– ShareFacebook8 ReviewsVotedOldestRecentRichiev 61 Loglines 3,404 Reviews 308 Best Reviews 81,417 Points View ProfileBest Answer Richiev Singularity 2019-06-30T08:15:04+10:00Added an answer on June 30, 2019 at 8:15 am Who is the lead character?What is their goal?What is standing in their way?0 Share ShareShare on FacebookShare on TwitterShare on LinkedInShare on WhatsAppdpg 105 Loglines 5,540 Reviews 558 Best Reviews 111,896 Points View ProfileBest Answer dpg Singularity 2019-06-30T11:24:29+10:00Added an answer on June 30, 2019 at 11:24 am The logline sets up an apocalyptic situation but doesn’t follow through with a plot.0 Share ShareShare on FacebookShare on TwitterShare on LinkedInShare on WhatsAppMike Pedley United Kingdom (UK) 67 Loglines 633 Reviews 99 Best Reviews 50,992 Points View ProfileBest Answer Mike Pedley Singularity 2019-07-01T17:49:18+10:00Added an answer on July 1, 2019 at 5:49 pm As Richiev and dpg have pointed out this is merely the world that is presented in the film. It’s like a prologue and would be covered in the first 5/10 mins. We need to know what specifically is happening to one (or a few) particular character(s) in this world. ?Consider Wall-E. In the first 10 mins or so we see the world as it currently is and through newspapers, big screen TV adverts, etc, we learn how and why the world is as it is – this is all done whilst being introduced to Wall-E.The logline itself doesn’t need to cover the world the story is set in as much detail. SciFi/fantasy is hard to logline for because you do need extra words to allow for the world building stuff but you only need to include stuff that is relevant to the story itself. If the protagonist is a doctor then the bit about antibiotics is more relevant. If they are a refugee, use the bit about refugees. It doesn’t mean that the world doesn’t include all of these elements, it just means the logline only includes the bits that are actually relevant to the story you are trying to tell.Hope this helps.0 Share ShareShare on FacebookShare on TwitterShare on LinkedInShare on WhatsApphenb 23 Loglines 43 Reviews 4 Best Reviews 1,142 Points View ProfileBest Answer henb Samurai 2019-07-10T00:43:26+10:00Added an answer on July 10, 2019 at 12:43 am UPDATE 1: A famous philosopher inspires much violence, an army of activists kill to save animals, and a race-car driver travels at untested light-speed to cool down the globe by inducing a second Ice Age.0 Share ShareShare on FacebookShare on TwitterShare on LinkedInShare on WhatsAppMike Pedley United Kingdom (UK) 67 Loglines 633 Reviews 99 Best Reviews 50,992 Points View ProfileBest Answer Mike Pedley Singularity 2019-07-10T01:18:25+10:00Added an answer on July 10, 2019 at 1:18 am COMMENTS FOR UPDATE 1:Working on the assumption that this is set in a future version of Earth – it has been well established that physical objects ?simply can’t travel at the speed of light. HOWEVER, I fully appreciate that that’s what scientists say now and in the future it’s possible that they might change their mind and that’s?not to mention the fact that this is a sci-fi film. BUT I can’t help but think if we can travel at the speed of light then all of the other stories are rendered irrelevant.I would focus on one of these three strand to be honest. It’s really hard to give any sort of feedback when you are merely stating characters and what they are doing rather than giving us a story. I don’t care about any of these characters because we have no reason to. If I don’t care then I’m not going to get past the logline.I also think if a second ice age is induced then surely all the animals that the activists are fighting for will die as will a lot of people. The philosopher bit is just a statement too. It doesn’t mean anything in a storytelling capacity.I think the version of the world set up in your first attempt is stronger because it’s not confused by the whole light speed bit. In that world you’ve set up, find an individual protagonist and tell us what their story is – inciting incident, character, goal, stakes.Hope this helps.0 Share ShareShare on FacebookShare on TwitterShare on LinkedInShare on WhatsAppdpg 105 Loglines 5,540 Reviews 558 Best Reviews 111,896 Points View ProfileBest Answer dpg Singularity 2019-07-10T03:47:25+10:00Added an answer on July 10, 2019 at 3:47 am The story sets out a situation where the world is going to hell in a hand basket.? But who is the main character?? What is the inciting incident?And although the scifi genre allows creative elasticity when it comes to the laws of physics, the? scientific “magic” has to have a verisimilitude of being scientifically credible.? And I just don ‘t see how traveling at light speed can instantiate another ice age.? How can a race-driver who in every second will be 186,000 miles further from the earth be able to pull off that stunt?0 Share ShareShare on FacebookShare on TwitterShare on LinkedInShare on WhatsApphenb 23 Loglines 43 Reviews 4 Best Reviews 1,142 Points View ProfileBest Answer henb Samurai 2019-10-22T23:30:43+10:00Added an answer on October 22, 2019 at 11:30 pm LOGLINE UPDATE #2:Flying around the globe at light-speed creates six versions of the same race-car driver, who must induce a second Ice Age by themselves after their travel companions become manic from the voyage.0 Share ShareShare on FacebookShare on TwitterShare on LinkedInShare on WhatsAppMike Pedley United Kingdom (UK) 67 Loglines 633 Reviews 99 Best Reviews 50,992 Points View ProfileBest Answer Mike Pedley Singularity 2019-10-23T19:54:22+10:00Added an answer on October 23, 2019 at 7:54 pm Surely the best person to fly this thing is not a race car driver but an astronaut… trained in this kinda thing. When the space programme started, they didn’t choose people who were just used to travelling at speed. They chose people who were intelligent and exceptional pilots… key word is pilots. Just because the driver is used to going fast doesn’t mean he can fly, so why would anyone think he was a better choice than the leading astronaut at that time? Someone who can fly and is also used to speed and has had psychological training to deal with such a situation. A race car driver just makes no sense to me at all.You’re telling us they must induce a second ice-age… but why? To what end. That’s the goal. Why does a second ice age need to be induced bearing in mind that most plants and animals on earth will die?!I stand by my previous thoughts on light speed travel. If light speed is possible, then everything changes. Everything is possible at that point unless you’re adding to what we currently know about light speed travel. If that’s the case, we NEED that information to understand how this could work.I think the idea that we will all be destroyed by Mother Nature is a good inciting incident BUT what your characters seem to do about it makes very little sense right now. There needs to be something that grounds it in reality even if it is a SciFi. How would light speed travel induce an ice age??0 Share ShareShare on FacebookShare on TwitterShare on LinkedInShare on WhatsAppYou must login to can add an answer. Username or email* Password* Remember Me! Forgot Password?