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RussellNSamurai
Posted: September 13, 20162016-09-13T09:00:54+10:00 2016-09-13T09:00:54+10:00In: Student Loglines

Breaking Bad: A terminal diagnosis leads a cash-strapped, loving father to the hostile world of illicit drug manufacture and its deadly associations.

Breaking Bad: A terminal diagnosis leads a cash-strapped, loving father to the hostile world of illicit drug manufacture and its deadly associations.
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    4 Reviews

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    1. Neer Shelter Singularity
      2016-09-13T12:00:46+10:00Added an answer on September 13, 2016 at 12:00 pm

      Series are best pitched and developed from the pilot episode.

      In episode one Walter is a disillusioned chemistry teacher – Character description.
      He is diagnosed with cancer – inciting incident.
      As a result of his diagnosis, he needs to find a quick way to provide for his family after he dies – dramatic need.
      He discovers that Jesse makes drugs – finds an ally.
      He decides to make drugs in a Winnebago – main action.
      He needs to sell the drugs to make lots of money – goal.

      Now let’s collide all the above into one sentence:
      After a disillusioned chemistry ?teacher is diagnosed with Cancer, he must set up a mobile methamphetamine lab with a former student?in order to provide for his family after he dies.

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    2. dpg Singularity
      2016-09-13T23:08:02+10:00Added an answer on September 13, 2016 at 11:08 pm

      >>>We HOPE it?s for his family, but we?re not sure he IS doing it for his family,

      It’s clearly established in the pilot that his original objective goal?in leveraging his chemistry know-how was to earn enough money to provide for his family after his death. ?? And that’s what he initially uses the money for. He’s only given 6 months to live; he has no expectations of a ?long term career in crime. But as the series progresses, things change and so does Walter White.

      A logline is a statement of the protagonist’s ?original objective goal, not a statement about subsequent transformations of character, goal, unintended consequences or unanticipated outcomes. ?(And there are plenty of all of the above in the series.)

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    3. Neer Shelter Singularity
      2016-09-15T11:28:04+10:00Added an answer on September 15, 2016 at 11:28 am

      Good characters, and indeed good stories, leave room for speculation about ulterior motives. However, the one “real” motivation the character is imbued with as a result of the inciting incident MUST be clearly understood. Otherwise the story gains a fragmented feel, and the character’s actions become confusing.

      As DPG explained, the subsequent changes Walter undergoes later in the series, are not relevant to the pilot they are parts of his inner arch – that of breaking bad. As previously noted, series are best pitched with the pilot therefore your logline was structured to describe the pilot episode plot, and as a result his initial motivation not his series long character development.

      That said, you could choose a later episode, which deals with his transformation into his Heisenberg alter ego, and structure a logline to describe that.

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    4. dpg Singularity
      2016-10-10T22:14:54+10:00Added an answer on October 10, 2016 at 10:14 pm

      When a meek, ?cash-strapped chemistry teacher is diagnosed with terminal cancer, he starts cooking meth to provide for his family after his death.
      (23 words)

      After re-viewing the pilot episode for “Breaking Bad”, ?I decided to revisit this as an ?example of how to write a logline for ?a series. ?And the way to do ?that is to focus on the script for the pilot episode that launches the series. ?The job of the pilot episode is 1] sell the series to producers; and then 2] hook viewer interest. ?The pilot script is the proof of concept and if it doesn’t make the sale, the series is DOA.

      The logline (and pilot script) for “Breaking Bad” ?does more than set up the inciting incident and objective goal for the action that drives the series. ?The description of the character flaw lays down the baseline for the transformation arc of the protagonist, Walter White.

      Initially, he’s the kind of guy who gets no respect; ?everybody including his students rolls over him. ?(It’s a great scene ?where relationship rolls are reversed; the teacher who gives orders to students in the classroom has to take them from the same kids at the car wash.) ?His new career as a meth cook will drive a 180-degree reversal in his behavior; ?he goes from being a milquetoast becomes a drug lord to be feared as well as respected, the one who comes knocking.

      And the logline and pilot lay down the baseline for the reversal of his financial fortune. He goes from being cash-strapped to having more cash than he knows what do with or where to stash.

      For me, the pilot episode for “Breaking Bad” is a model in how to launch a series.

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