Friendly ETs frequently rescue abducted humans from bad ETs that eat their prey. Now, they must stop humans from nuking the earth so the good ETs can have another living planet in their interstellar federation.

Steve Penpusher Asked on February 27, 2019 in SciFi.
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Why do these friendly ETs need another living planet in the interstellar federation? Is there any way to tell this story from the perspective of the humans? They’re the one with the biggest journey to go on and the easiest ones for the audience to relate to. It also creates the most dramatic inciting incident – mankind finding out they are not alone in the universe.

How do these aliens plan on stopping humans nuking the earth? I’m struggling to see what’s going to happen other than people sitting around discussing things.

Personally, I think the whole friendly aliens saving humans from bad ones is great and I think that could be used more. There needs to be more conflict and more action going on.

You need a main character – alien or human – who the audience sees this story from the perspective of. Without that it’s very difficult to see anything other than nameless, faceless characters. There’s no heart to the story and that’s really important.

There’s definitely something in here so keep going. Ideally though, if you could put new versions of the logline within this post. It makes it easier for everyone to follow its evolution.

mikepedley85 Overlord Reviewed on February 27, 2019.

Thanks Mike, for your comments. I argue that I must accomplish this task with 35 words or less. I feel that what you ask can be found in a synopsis.

 

The title of my script project is “The Extraterrestrial Highway”, and it can be found and downloaded in PDF on ScriptRevolution.com and the synopsis can be found there also. I must admit that the synopsis is a work in progress. However the script is complete.

 

You stated, “There needs to be more conflict and more action going on.”

 

I like to laud that according to the STATISTICS in my script writing program, FADE-IN, the ratio of Action to Dialogue is 69% Action / 31% Dialogue. So this script is NOT a Soap Opera of people sitting around and talking to each other. The writing is very pictorial and cinematic.

 

Again, thanks for your help. My weakness has always been getting the DNA of a story into 35 words…

 

https://www.scriptrevolution.com/scripts/the-extraterrestrial-highway

Steve

on February 28, 2019.
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