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betzey411Logliner
Posted: July 15, 20172017-07-15T05:31:40+10:00 2017-07-15T05:31:40+10:00In: Coming of Age

UPDATED: When a teenage boy living in modern-day Texas befriends a teenage Mexican slave, he must expose a secret slave-trading business to save his friend.

UPDATED: When a teenage boy living in modern-day Texas befriends a teenage Mexican slave, he must expose a secret slave-trading business to save his friend.
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    1. Neer Shelter Singularity
      2017-07-15T11:38:42+10:00Added an answer on July 15, 2017 at 11:38 am

      Perhaps best to describe the American boy as a bigot, his goal would then necessitate him to complete his inner journey and make his story far more interesting – teenage boy means little as a character description in a logline.

      What is his specific goal he must achieve in order to free his new friend? Is it to have the master mind behind the slave trade arrested? Is it to capture the bad guys red handed on video? What ever it is, it has to be specified in the logline, “…must expose a secret slave-trading business…” can mean any number of things in today’s net savvy world.

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    2. Neer Shelter Singularity
      2017-07-15T11:46:22+10:00Added an answer on July 15, 2017 at 11:46 am

      I just read your previous post about the same concept.

      In future, please restrict your revisions to the same thread of the original logline, you’ll be able to track the logline/concept’s evolution more easily this way.

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