TBA
When a beautiful young woman is found brutally murdered, a detective must travel to the remote island to find the killer before they kill again!
Share
Have an account? Sign In Now
Lost your password? Please enter your email address. You will receive a link and will create a new password via email.
Please briefly explain why you feel this question should be reported.
Please briefly explain why you feel this answer should be reported.
Please briefly explain why you feel this user should be reported.
This logline describes most detective stories ever told because to catch a killer is what most detectives do any how.
What about this will be different? How will this story be unique? What about this story will hook peoples interests?
About the story elements and structure for a detective to find a young woman dead is part of their job not an unusual event that sets them off on the path to achieve a goal. Therefore finding the woman dead is not an inciting incident. What other event can trigger the detective and motivate him to take action? Or how can you change this woman’s death to be more impactful? Was she his daughter, wife or mistress?
Hope this helps.
I agree with the previous comment. A logline must hook the reader, this one is absolutely too vague.
Why a remote Island. Which Island?
What Nir Shelter and FFF said. There is nothing that stands out, that differentiates this story from all the other stories about detectives tracking down a murderer.
(And how does the detective know the murderer will kill again?)
Give the town’s people a goal. Don’t know if this is your story, just a suggestion.
a beautiful young woman is brutally murdered, a detective travels to the remote island to find that the population is secretive and obstructs the investigation at every turn.
Put some oppositional force. Or like suggested state a ticking clock leading up to the next murder.