When a disgraced medical student is sent into the outer realms of the Milky Way, to practice trans-species medicine as punishment, he discovers a plot to kill the imperial family and overthrow the galactic dynasty.

Mandavirmais Samurai Asked on February 11, 2019 in SciFi.
Add Comment
2 Review(s)

“When he discovers a plot to kill the imperial family, a disgraced medical student who was banished to the outer rim must…” (then tell us what he must do)

Richiev Singularity Reviewed on February 11, 2019.
Add Comment

Currently, this is just a long way of saying the inciting incident which (as Richiev) has pointed out, is just the discovery of this plot. What happens next?

Why is he disgraced and what bearing does that have on the story? Why is it relevant that he is practicing trans-species medicine? At the moment, these are unnecessary to the story – as I understand it from this version of the logline. If they are really important then make sure we understand why.

Hope this helps.

mikepedley85 Mentor Reviewed on February 11, 2019.
Add Comment

Your Review

By posting your answer, you agree to the privacy policy and terms of service.