When a peaceful young man from the hard streets of gangland Los Angeles accidentally travels through time and witnesses his grandfather commit murder, he fights to change the past without becoming as violent as his neighborhood. Note: Series pilot for an hour-long drama.

    Penpusher Posted on April 2, 2020 in SciFi.
    Add Comment
    2 Review(s)

      What special twist, unique take does this take on the time traveling trope that hasn’t already been explored in other films?

      What is at stake for the protagonist?  He may want to stop his grandfather from committing murder.  But in drama that’s not good enough.  He needs to stop the murder; he MUST undo the past — or else.

      Well, or else what?  What is the do-or-die, life-or-death reason why he MUST undo the past?

      Singularity Answered on April 3, 2020.

      I don’t know how much you normally converse on these… but the twist in the approach to time travel is a bit complicated to get across in a logline. The protagonist discovers the innate ability to travel through time quite by accident. It’s an ability he shares with his grandfather and when the protagonist is in the past he sees his current-day grandfather killing someone. We find out that the grandfather has become a time-vigilante of sorts because their ability also comes with a compulsion, if they do nothing to change the specific instance in history they’re drawn to they are consumed by severe pain and slowly driven mad…. so the protagonist tries to find a different way to change the same occurrence, but this time in a way that doesn’t involve violence.

      Definitely open to thoughts on how you would try to communicate that in a logline.

      on April 3, 2020.

      Maybe something like:

      • When a peaceful teen from the streets of Compton accidentally travels through time, he witnesses his grandfather commit murder. Now he must fight to change the past without becoming as violent as his neighborhood before his newfound ability literally drives him mad.

      I’m worried about it becoming too long… but do agree that it sets up bigger stakes.

      on April 3, 2020.
      Add Comment

        There is a lot going on in this story from what you explained. It’s a little confusing. Adding time travel to a storyline can be risky, because it has been done so many times. In addition, it has to be clear so everyone gets it. Remember you have to pitch this idea. If you have to take time to explain this to a producer , it’s a no go. Look into movies like the Butterfly Effect, Project Almanac, and the Time Travelers Wife for examples. That will help execute your idea better into a simple yet interesting concept.

        I hope this helps. Happy writing.

        Penpusher Answered on April 3, 2020.
        Add Comment

        Your Review

        By posting your review, you agree to the privacy policy and terms of service.