“When he discovers his father will be fired as coach if he doesn’t bring home a championship, a popular quarterback must rally his good looking and talented team to beat the scruffy, overachieving, underdogs that, every year seem to defeat them in the final game.” -Overdogs-

    Singularity Posted on June 24, 2016 in Comedy.
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    9 Review(s)

      This is a very intriguing idea.
      In order to prevent his father from being fired as coach, a star quaterback must rally his nearly undefeated team to beat the scruffy underdog team which always manages to win the championship. (~33 words)
      One of the things in yours is that you drive the length up with many adjectives.

      Summitry Answered on June 24, 2016.

      Great point, I like the re-write!

      on June 24, 2016.

      Glad you like it. Good luck to you and your story.

      on June 24, 2016.
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        Please write this script. As someone writing a traditional sports film, I love this idea. Such fertile ground for comedy.

        Penpusher Answered on June 24, 2016.

        Thanks. I am going to start the process by watching every ‘underdog’ movie I can find. This idea just seemed like a fun one to me

        on June 24, 2016.

        I think the Star QB will also have his girlfriend stolen by a nerd.

        on June 24, 2016.
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          Great idea, with huge comedy potential. My only suggestion is to think about what his internal journey will be (i.e. how the quarterback will change). I don’t know if that necessarily needs to be in the logline, but something you need to think about.

          Penpusher Answered on June 25, 2016.
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            LOL!

            Great idea, Richiev, to turn every sports underdog trope and plot gimmick inside out, upside down.

            I’m not sure about the inciting incident.  I would be inclined to set it up as a traditional school rivalry between pretty prep boys and homely home boys  — a class conflict.  The scrappy, working class Underdogs playing for a public school have always beaten the elitist, privileged and pampered Overdogs who play for a private school.  The  quarterback’s objective goal is to fulfill his dream of being the hero who breaks the losing streak — and since it’s his senior year, this is is last chance to do it.

            Anyway, it’s a great premise rich with comedic possibilities.    This is a movie I want to see.   (But I will still root for the underdogs!)

            Best wishes.

            Singularity Answered on June 25, 2016.

            Part of my thinking is that the school nerd wins the heart of the lead character’s girlfriend (The head cheerleader) by singing to her in front of the whole assembly. I was thinking of that as backstory but I could play around and see if that might make a good inciting incident.

            on June 25, 2016.
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              I really love this idea!  I agree that using the father’s job as motivation pulls me out of the meat of the story, and agree it would be better to stay focused on the rivalry/schoolmates. The motivation of the girlfriend being stolen, makes perfect sense to me that it would cause him to want to defeat the other team.

              Just had an idea:  If you want us to root for the QB to win the game and defeat the nerd in the end, it might be a good idea to first have the nerd win the girlfriend by doing something nerdy and “underdog-ish”, that maybe makes the QB look like a jerk, but then at the end of the movie, the nerd is exposed for using his underdog-ness to manipulate her (possibly by setting up a scenario where he looks especially nerdy or like an underdog) and the QB, having truly changed, has a chance to win her back.  I think this would play better than having the nerd do something genuinely heroic or pretending to be cool, but maybe he’s not even as nerdy as he pretends to be.

              OR

              If you want the nerd to keep the GF, maybe the QB finds his own nerdy girl at the end and falls for her.

              Hope some of this can be helpful!

              Penpusher Answered on June 26, 2016.
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                My concern is:  what is your story really about?  What is the primary story thread: the comeuppance of the Big Man on Campus (BMOC)?  Or the rivalry between two schools?  In either case, it’s the same protagonist with almost identical events, but if the primary story line is the rivalry, then it seems to me that the rival for the girl friend should be someone from that story line — from the rival school.

                On the other foot, if the primary story line is about the comeuppance of  the BMOC. then the rival for the girlfriend can come from either.

                And to reiterate, I love the concept. And I hope the grand gesture arises out of who the nerd really is, not who he tries to be.  

                fwiw

                Singularity Answered on June 26, 2016.
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                  I think the father’s job on the line could be moved to later in the story so it is what adds stakes before the end of the story.

                  Summitry Answered on June 28, 2016.
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                    Is the nerd from the rival school?  (And why not have him win the girl by simply being himself — a nerd? Otherwise, the singing schtick is another one of the tried-and-tired tropes where the underdog has to act like an overdog to win the girl.  

                    Why can’t the nerd just win the girl by being true to himself?  (And wouldn’t that just drive the QB jock crazy with consternation and jealousy?)

                    Why not that the QB of the rival team (who is everything thing the protagonist is not) steals the protagonist’s girlfriend?  Either as the inciting incident or an aggravating incident that further motivates him.  That way , you give the protagonist the strongest possible person motivation.  He not only wants to  defeat the underdogs — he must defeat them to 1] fulfill his dream;2] avenge the theft of his girl; 3] and win her back.

                    fwiw

                    Singularity Answered on June 26, 2016.

                    At the end of many underdog movie, the Nerd, (who has been pining away for the head cheerleader) does a ‘grand gesture’ to win the heart of his love interest. The girl is so moved she abandons her star QB boyfriend and runs to the arms of the nerd while the whole school claps and cheers.  The star QB then slinks away in shame.

                    on June 26, 2016.

                    The nerd from the underdog school?

                    on June 26, 2016.

                    This is a good question, I may have to think about this, and watch some underdog movies.

                    on June 26, 2016.
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                      Sounds like a good inciting incident and a fun romp. This could play out well as a feature film.

                      Samurai Answered on February 1, 2017.
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