When King Henry VIII dies, members of his court rally for their share of power, and intend to keep the monarch’s death a secret for as long as they need; but this leaves the royal surgeon with a decaying body that nobody can know of.

    Penpusher Posted on April 8, 2019 in Historical.
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      The logline seems to describes more of a situation than a plot.  Members of the court seem to have a vague goal — to jockey for power in the succession.  But the logline focuses on the surgeon who has a no objective goal.  Just a dead body.

      Whatever the jockeying for influence was, there was no doubt, no question as to the line of succession: Henry VIII had only one male heir and he was crowned  the next king, Edward VI, even though he was just a 10 year old kid.

      But the boy king died at the age of 15.  Then the palace intrigue really got interesting and plots abounded because all the immediate candidates in the line of succession were female, a situation England had never faced before.

      I don’t see what the story hook, is here,  what dramatic plot arises from the situation of the king’s death.

      Singularity Answered on April 8, 2019.

      Hi! Thanks for your feedback. I understand why you find it too vague.
      As there was indeed no question as to who was the heir to the throne, at nine years old Edward was too young to rule. The people who were to be his council, took Henry’s will and testament and (might have) changed some things that were written in it for their own good.  Now that I’m writing that I realise I might need to mention that in the logline as well. Back to the drawing board!

      on April 8, 2019.

      I should think the dilemmas facing the  physician attending to the dying Edward VI would present plenty of material for drama.

      on April 8, 2019.

      It does, but that is for another script.

      on April 8, 2019.
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        If the surgeon’s dilemma is for another script, leave it out of this logline. The way this logline is worded makes it seem like a large part of the story will focus on him.

        Give us one protagonist that we follow and are rooting for and write the whole logline from their perspective. This will help bring the story together as you will be able to focus on one character’s desires, failings and rivals – goal, arc, and antagonist(s).

        The Favourite is a great example of backstabbing, blackmail, etc in an historical film so I would highly recommend watching it. Another great example is The Death of Stalin which deals with a very similar premise albeit in a more modern setting.

        Overlord Answered on April 9, 2019.
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