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I feel, like I'd like to hear more about the journey and the obstacles there. Other than? not knowing where to find the family. At the moment, I'm picturing someone taking a flight, checking in in a youth hostel?and knocking at random doors.
Which part of it would you guys cut?
I think what?s happening is that you are mixing up two different formats. You?re pretty close, but a logline benefits from following a very specific structure. Just check back with the formula. Know whee to find it? What you wrote is more something you?d read in a tv magazine or so. Which is ok forRead more