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When an 18-year-old female accidentally leaves a love letter to her female crush on the kitchen counter, she must find a way to come out to her parents before her mother accuses her father of cheating.
I think the term, 'unsuspecting parents' works well. Not sure if you need to tell us she is confessing her feelings since you already said it was a love letter, so it is implied. If you dropped that line but kept everything else the same it would read like this. --- "When an 18-year-old closeted lesRead more
I think the term, ‘unsuspecting parents’ works well.
Not sure if you need to tell us she is confessing her feelings since you already said it was a love letter, so it is implied.
If you dropped that line but kept everything else the same it would read like this.
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“When an 18-year-old closeted lesbian accidentally leaves a love letter out in the open, she must bite the bullet and come out to her unsuspecting parents before her mother accuses her father of cheating.”
This will help a bit with the word count.
Anyway, I like the concept, and as I said earlier, the sense of what the story is about comes through in the logline.
See lessWhen a charismatic pick pocket acquires the bag of a world leader along with top secret information, he must risk making enemies in order to leak the information to the world.
You should tell us what information the lead character discovers so the reader will know the stakes.
You should tell us what information the lead character discovers so the reader will know the stakes.
See lessWhen a charismatic pick pocket acquires the bag of a world leader along with top secret information, he must risk making enemies in order to leak the information to the world.
You should tell us what information the lead character discovers so the reader will know the stakes.
You should tell us what information the lead character discovers so the reader will know the stakes.
See less